The biggest fear when it comes to a relationship is
whether or not a certain person will leave you hurt,
heart broken or otherwise affected. What I’ve
found though is that many people open themselves up for
potential hurt by not following a few common
sense rules. It seems that the desire to be around
someone who is interested in you, even if you
are “settling” by being with him or her, is worth the
risk. If you find yourself in, or afraid of these types
of situations, keep in mind the following tips. They
just might help you avoid a future hurt.

Find Out Where You Stand

The unknown is a powerful force. It can drive you
crazy, make you doubt yourself and potentially
destroy a relationship. Don’t let this happen to you!
Make sure you know where you stand in your
relationship. In the same respect, make sure you
continually let your partner know where they stand
as well. You’ll both be happier, and you’ll have an
easier time of communicating to each other.

Don’t Play Mind Games

The person you are involved with, or about to be
involved with, is another being — just like you.
Playing mind games is just another way to
increase your chances of getting hurt in the end.
Personally, I feel that if you are willing to play mind
games with a person, then you don’t respect that
individual enough for a relationship anyway. So do
that person a favor and let him or her go.

Don’t Sleep With Someone You Don’t Know Very
Well Yet

This may seem obvious, but for many people it is
not. I’ve heard countless requests for advice
involve a person not sure where they stand with a
certain person, yet they’ve been involved intimately
with them. Now they are faced with a potential
loveless affair, are completely unhappy, and are
being driven by the fear of the unknown. No matter
what the urge is, if you are interested in someone
for more than just a fling, don’t do it until, at the
very least, you are clear about the other person’s
feelings for you. You can avoid many future
downfalls by following this tip!

Be Honest With Each Other

Your honesty, or lack thereof, can either build or
destroy your relationship. Be honest with your
partner about everything, and expect the same
from your partner. Too many times, I see people
who have let their partner lie to them about
everything, cheat on them, and worse — yet, they
continue to be with them all “in the name of love.”
That type of love is no love at all. It is clinging to
the fact that being with someone, even though they
are hurting you, is better than being alone. It is
fine, and perfectly reasonable to have strong
feelings or affection towards someone, but it is
altogether something else when you allow yourself
to stay in a relationship that has a negative effect
on you.

Don’t Settle

If you know that a person isn’t right for you — go
find someone who is. Don’t wait to see if the
relationship could turn into something better. You’ll
only find yourself a few years down the line in the
same, or in an even worse, situation than you are
in now. If you find yourself nit-picking about too
many of your partner’s traits early in your
relationship, think forward to how much
these “traits” will bother you after a few years.


A relationship is 50% your responsibility, and 50%
your partner’s. Sometimes those numbers change
depending on the situation. If you find things going
down the wrong path, speak up and do something
about it. Don’t let it slide, thinking that things will
get better. Proclaimed ignorance is not an excuse.
This is YOUR life, don’t be afraid to do things that
will make it better.


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